One of the hardest lessons I have faced as an adult has been learning to set my own boundaries. So many of us grew up being taught that we are here to please others. No matter if it is family, friends, or even our jobs. But when we do this, we often put ourselves on the back burner. We neglect our well-being both physically and mentally. I’m here to tell you to stop! Say “NO”. Do what is best for you and your well-being. You owe no one anything, but you owe yourself everything.
For so long I always said yes to others. I said yes no matter if I wanted to or not in order to keep others happy. I let them belittle me. I let other take advantage of my kindness. I sacrificed for others. I lost time. I got burnt out. I slowly but surely became miserable. One day I happened to be scrolling social media after a couple really hard months and stumbled upon a quote one day that changed my entire outlook.
This quote changed my entire outlook. I began setting boundaries. I started to appreciate myself enough to say no or to walk away from situations I knew were no longer benefiting me or my well-being.
You may be thinking… “Well Christian, that’s easier said than done. What about my family and friends?”
Trust me, the easy part is saying no. The hard part is the aftermath. Yes, others may get upset or feel you don’t care. I lost contact with many family members when I began setting boundaries. That just goes to show how important it is to set those boundaries! After years of putting myself first and setting boundaries, I feel like an entirely new person. I enjoy the life I live and know that the decisions I make are for myself.
Tune into your body. Take time and look at your priorities. Take space. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable! Change is hard no matter what, but growth is the only way to ever find true happiness.
The great thing is that boundaries are flexible. At any given time, you can decided to change depending on your current situation. Don’t be afraid to do what is best for you no matter what others make say.